Meet cutis's alter ego, im gonna call her Lesbian Curtis since i cant remember the name he gave her. He/She (I know, its confusing) likes the new white girl.Lets call her white girl number 2 (Kelly will ALWAYS be number 1)
The white girl also likes him and they end up back at Curtis's yard
White girl: Lets have sex Curtis!
Curtis: DPMO put your head in its right position fam
Meanwhile, Kelly still has nice curves, plus she's a rocket scientist which is always a bonus (AND she's wearing Adidas). Everytime I see her I say 'What tha Fook Is Broonch?!' or 'it's the afterbirth you dick!' in my head with her accent. Only me? Ok I'll move on. She spends the episode following a random guy. Fun times.
So white girl tells lesbian Curtis normal Curtis was a crap beat (probably 'cos he just wanted brain). And Curtis feels his whole life is parred and seeks solace in his ex-wifey for lifey Alesha.
Alesha: But bruv you was a shit fuck, you was bare touching your tings without looking at me fam. Some battyboy flexes there.
Lesbian Curtis touches herself innapropriately.
She then touches white girl number 2 innapropriately.
White girl number 2: I'm normally only bi-sexual when drunk and infront of men but i'll make an exception.
If only she knew...
We then go on to the first bocatting scene of the episode.
So Curtis is definately a lesbian.
Good for you bro.
This is weird rapist guy. He likes to drug drinks and give them to young, vulnerable women (or in Curtis's case, men).
You got some issues that need addressing bro.
I would talk about the next scene but the wannabe Nathan is in it (YOU'LL NEVER BE NATHAN FAM GIVE UP) and i always feel the need to flykick him in the throat whenever he's in a scene.
Wannabe Nathan: This is something the scriptwriters would have made Nathan do so im obviously gonna do it *starts bowcatting lesbian Curtis*
White girl number 2 walks in and is bare emotional and ting at lesbian Curtis's betrayal.
White girl number 2: Nahhh fam allow yourself, thats my ting there. DPMO.
Oh yeah, remember weird rapist guy? Well he manages to get Curtis into his Rape-Mobile.
I pray to God that isn't Curtis's actual penis. Anyways this allows Curtis to escape weird rapist guy's car (and hopefully find some underwear and a longer dress)
KELLY'S ON IT. She thinks Simon is cheating on Alesha with lesbian Curtis (like, really?) and doesn't even call her mandem for back up.
Kelly: Ayy blud, you see you yeah, don't think I won't give you the one bang bruv. I'm a fookin' Rocket scientist so its baaarree easy for me to hide your body afterwards. Simon's Aleshas ting fam, low yourself and your picky hair.
White girl number 2 comes in and gives lesbian Curtis the one bang (Kelly celebrates and congratulates her gyaldem) for 'cheating' on her with wannabe Nathan *sigh*
Kelly: Urm darling, I think someone needs a jumbo tampon.
I don't think anything needs to be said in this scene.
Weird white guy tries to strike again with white girl number 2 but Curtis saves the day. Well done, Curtis *pats head*
Curtis decides he has to come clean about his female alter-ego and so explains his situation. Being bi-sexual (no trend) white girl number 2 is obviously over the moon about getting to choose who she gets to have sex with (Monday- Curtis, Tuesday- Lesbian Curtis?)
White girl number 2: Ahh im bare happs and ting, i get to bocatt AND be bocatted *does happy dance*
And so we end with wannabe Nathan telling everyone about his, urm oral adventures into lesbian Curtis's box.
Wannabe Nathan: *says something intended for Nathan to say 'cos he's such a beg*
And thats it for this week folks, Keep locked in every week for the Misfits Grimey Recap.
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